No one uses Blogger anymore, so this is more of a journal than anything. A record of my fucked up relationship with food and calories.

I've been using Noom to track my intake the last week or so. It divides everything into green, yellow, and red sections. Tonight I'm a full 2,144 calories over my daily budget (which is a "healthy" 2000 calories because I've been drinking. Binging comes with drinking, and I have a hard time controlling myself when my boyfriend is eating too.

Today was a horrible day for food. I worked a 16 hour shift yesterday because someone didn't show up. I had a salad for lunch before work (415) and half an apple for snack at 4 (48). Dinner was a little General Tso's chicken and rice with a boiled egg (393), but I purged it, because I'm a fucking idiot. At about 3 am I had a mini bag if chips and 2 oatmeal creme pies (500) because I was fucking starving and there's nothing healthy in the break room at work. Breakfast was 2 (gag) Mcdonalds sandwiches, a hashbrown, and about 32 ounces of orange juice. It was all purged immediately. I only charted the orange juice (280). Lunch was mini corndogs, fries, and chicken tenders that my boyfriend made (more than 578) because I have no god damn self control. Dinner was an atrocious 910 calorie taco, and my evening "snack" was goldfish, shrimp, and a full 1100 calories worth of alcohol. 1100 calories for 2 cups of Kinky. What the fuck? I fully expect to have gained 4 or 5 pounds tomorrow morning. On the plus side I got 450 calories of walking done, mostly at work, so that's something. I'm still 1900 calories over though.

I feel so disgusting. No matter what I do, what mindset I try to have, I still end up eating a fuckton of food.

I'm watching Supersize Vs Superskinny yet again, and I find myself simultaneously understanding of just how much the Supersizers eat, as well as appalled by how much the Superskinnies eat. Not quite sure how that works out.